Being Changed...

I remember the days when I'd try to pray and my mind would wander off... or I'd try to pray at night and wake up in the morning asking, "oops, did I say amen?" I would read bits and pieces of the Bible -- in colored comics when I was kid, then (embarrassingly) upgraded to Scripture portions in microscopic fonts featured in little devotional books, or whatever self-help Christian books I had in the shelf...

Reminiscing my spiritual walk - who I was and who I have become through the work of sanctification and regeneration of God through the Holy Spirit, always drives me to my knees in worship. It awes me to silence at the thought that God Himself, the Creator of all things, would love me unconditionally; would personally and patiently teach me, train me for godliness; would lovingly discipline me as a father to his child. Through Christ Jesus, my Lord and Savior, whose blood was poured out so that we could be justified, I am able to know God and to love Him back, and have the privilege of running to Him and delighting in Him.

Oh, the old days when I'd curse the morning light had been replaced with longing to fellowship with God in prayer and excitedly feast upon His precious Word - the Bread of Life! I know in my heart, that it was all Him, nothing of me. I love because He first loved me. I cling to Him because He drew me to Himself. I am like a sheep who've started to recognize the gentle voice of my Shepherd whom I trust with everything I am. And I know could only move forward, following Him. To know Him more, to learn His ways and be given grace to obey. That at the end, my heart would look like His.


Oh God, prepare me for eternity.

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